After a week from hell, I attempted to lose myself in the world of virtual “hope and change” at my local Wi-Fi bar on a Friday afternoon. I hoped that the oil destroying the waters 30 miles south of my “office” would disappear, and needed a change from all the insane chatter dominating politics and the media.
With the hollow words of a narcissistic President still ringing in my ears, following perhaps the worst speech ever given by a “Commander-In Chief” (MSNBC), escape was my objective. Attempting to cool off from the lingering heat wave hanging over the Deep South, I tried to work on my latest business plan in the sublime confines of the “Jags Grill”. Named after the University of South Alabama “Jaguars”, the actual mascot “SouthPaw”, is often seen prowling around the grill hunting for something frosty. The full name of the person in the suit must never be revealed to the general public, but congratulations Justin for winning the first everNational Championship award for my alma mater…USA, USA!
As I sat watching the second round of the U.S. Open, pecking away on my Gateway and sipping on my “Obama Beer” ($1 happy hour bottles, cheap and gives you a headache…like Obama), I was unexpectedly “interrupted”. Bantering with the regulars about the golf tournament, the disaster in the gulf, and of course politics, I “occasionally” voice my opinion. This is particularly true when the subject broaches the namesake for my inexpensive beer, President Barack Hussein Obama…mmm, mmm, mmm (YouTube video).
When the clock strikes “Obama-o’clock” (5pm), bartender and USAgrad Jamie, the intelligent, attractive, athletic, M.D. to be usually asks me if I’m ready for an “Obama Beer”. My fellow blogger, (The GTL™) is normally perched on a stool nearby, creating his daily political “photo shop” column and thinking about whatever it is Liberals think about (or should I say “feeeel”). On this Friday afternoon, an unfamiliar patron was in proximity of our un-leased office space. As usual, comments began echoing about the bar, about the anointed one, the floundering economy, and of course, our now famous “Obama Beer”. I certainly wasn’t the only one guilty of violating that unwritten rule to refrain from opining about “politics and religion” in public. But regardless, this young, sharp-looking African American gentleman targeted me. It took several of his “non-Obama” drinks for him to approach our political lair, but when he did, the stereo-types and liberal talking points were flying around like 3-point bombs from deep behind and way “left” of the line.
His first series of comments were regarding “history”, and “the numbers”. He claimed that Obama would be remembered as a “great President”, as I paraphrase. He retorted that Jimmy Carter was “distracted” by the hostage crisis, and if not for that, he too would be considered a great President, “if you look at real history and the numbers”…gulp.
The late great communicator, President Reagan, was his next target, as “all he did was increase federal spending and propose trickle-down economics, which was a complete failure”. This was too good, a real live liberal in our midst’s, other than The GTL™, who is usually too busy fabricating fake pictures to disparage anything involving the GOP, Sarah Palin, or reality.
As I tried to remain calm, and provide historical fact to defend the conservative cause, it became apparent that this poor soul was lost. Michael Savage claims “Liberalism Is A Mental Disorder”, and my new friend was quickly making the case for the Liberal Disease.
Several other customers were quite amused by his “theories”, which included, “unemployment is way down”, and “the government should take over the auto industry, banks, and the oil companies”. The normally quiet GTL™ (since he is usually the only Liberal in the house), would periodically blurt out endorsements, cheers, and encourage his fellow liberal. When the topic of “border control and illegal aliens” came up, our “Obama Beer Interrupter” proclaimed that they are “good for the country” and “let them be“. “American won’t do the jobs they take and the rich keep them in the country for cheap labor”, as The GTL™ applauded spasmodically.
According the most observers, I clearly won the “debate”, other than his partner in crime The GTL™ who called the match “a draw”. Not sure what history book or evidence they can provide to prove their case, but a “Hail Mary” came unexpectedly (like the “unexpected” rise in unemployment, again) from my profusely bleeding opponent…
I had attempted to re-educate my good friend as to WHY immigrants have come to Americafor hundreds of years, including our amigos to the south. Freedom was my answer, his was “they know they can get stuff for free and be taken care of by the government”. Good God, maybe he’s right, at least in the Obama era. To my point that “the war on poverty” has failed, and that government programs have “enabled” and encouraged a “dependent class” among the poor, my misguided combatant, threw the only thing he had left in his liberal bag…the race card.
Quietly, he stood next to me and almost whispered what he really believes. He detailed that his race was brought to America“against our will”, and the other immigrants came by choice. That this enslavement created a “dependency on white men”, and that this behavior is “inbred”. This was after I had applauded and quoted Martin Luther King, and illustrated how Obama has further divided the country along ideological and ethnic lines. Yet my words fell on deaf ears, even with a Black president in the “White” house, will it ever end? History and numbers don’t lie, unless you’re a Liberal with a “mental disorder”.
So Jamie, may I please order another “Obama Beer”, and please make it a double…